Mar 21, 2012

Ick. I bet there are more freezers full of semen in this world than old Fudgesicles and iced-over waffles.

I want to shout it from the rooftops how much I love this bucking bull magazine.  Move over, US Weekly, I've got a new periodical to join me in the tub for a relaxing evening of red wine, popcorn and White Rain body wash.

This is the type of full page ad you find in this magazine. Bulls featured like MMA fighters but with names that often refer to their penises (see also: Very Smart Remedy AKA Red Bone).  

There's a lot of bull semen in this world, folks. Just F.Y.I.

Some of these bulls have pretty bad ass names too.  But then there's Navaho Rug, who I bet has a rough go of it around other guys named James's Slip Knot. 

Navajo Rug's friends:
Cooter Cat 
Mr. Coffee 
Little Bojangles
Daddies Jacket
Kung Fu Panda
Wax Job
Silk Jacket
Denim Dan
Dr. House
Circus Peanut

James's Slip Knot's friends:
Freak Beast
Dirty Johnny
Smoke Wagon
Kill the Lights
Power Ball
Armand Hammer
Keg Stand
Shanghai Express
Son of Pain
Cocked Pistol
Neon Hammer

Gitcha Some Wine
Mr. Wu
Colonel Conagher

Mar 2, 2012

Except you Gene Wilder circa Haunted Honeymoon!

All my early celebrity crushes have either committed suicide, turned out gay or ended up in porn (see above).