Aug 22, 2013

He's so gross, right? Like, really gross.

This is exactly what I thought the 80's were like in L.A. when I was growing up. I thought it was all drugged out looking greasy haired guys and half naked girls with poor taste in fashion and makeup just all hanging out together and doing nasty things like drinking and smoking too many cigarettes and listening to heavy metal. I thought Sunset looked like this during the day in L.A.  It both terrified me and made me want to run away to L.A. when I got to high school so I could smoke and have big hair and dress like Kelly Bundy. Everything is getting so cleaned up these days. Like all urban lofts and farmer's markets and food trucks you take your grandma to. So I'm glad to know Corey Feldman is still out there somewhere grossing up the place. But really, gross, Corey Feldman. You are really really really gross.

Aug 8, 2013

I find the Kardashians are the easiest to zone out to

Sometimes you've gotta just drink your Miller Lite on the treadmill and call it a day.

Aug 7, 2013

Teach me how to fight

I don't really know how to act in big-time verbal altercations, but just from watching Real Housewives of (insert city-name-featuring-people-living-in-gated-communities-with-a-seemingly-enormous-lack-of-education-and-awareness-of-social-graces-and-fashion-sense-and-decorating-beyond-a-faux-Tuscan-theme here), it appears to involve lots of hand clapping to magnify the seriousness of individual words.

Aug 5, 2013

A true test of marriage

...is when your partner asks you to search high and low for a single missing orthopedic shoe insert at 9:45pm.